Nocturnal Amiss....

Ok, so we'll add another anecdote to the "only in LA" category. Last night I'm lying in bed reading a novel (about a ghost that helps her niece solve mysteries--quite cute and very British!) when I hear this gigantic BOOM. My first thought--somebody had a ginormous accident on the 101 (which is about, oh, 50 yards from my bedroom window). I listened for sirens but didn't hear any and the traffic seemed to keep flowing. So not an accident. Oh, I know!! It was gunshots. Oh my god, someone got shot near my house. Two minutes of panic and still no sirens. At this point, Tristan comes to bed and says "hey, did you hear that thunder?" Yep folks, apparently I've been living in the big city too long because I no longer recognize the sound of THUNDER. Or maybe it's because it doesn't rain here during the summer and I was subconsciously aware of that fact--thus my brain thought it couldn't be thunder.

I've been experiencing a lot of things that go bump in the night lately. Most of it has to do with the construction on Cahuenga. Ok, so they can't start their jackhammers until a civilized 7:30AM (whatever, that is still WAY too early) but they can drive their HUGE dumptrunks and earthmovers and other digging machiny-things made by Caterpillar (shout out to PA) past my house at 5:30 AM. I hear their air brakes as they stop at the stop sign and their backing up alarm noises as they realize they cut the corner too short and can not possibly make the turn onto the next street. I want to write to the city and complain. For a week and a half I've been awakened a full hour and a half before I have to get up (on work days) and about 4 hours before I have to get up on non-work days. That's precious sleep that this busy girl can't afford to lose, people!

As if the trucks weren't bad enough, we've got some nightingales living in the tree outside our bedroom. Well, they might be finches or some other bird creature, I don't know my birds. All I do know is that they are night owls--hee-hee--who chirp incessantly like it is dawn at 2AM. They call out to other birds, they chat it up and they sing--which I'm sure to themselves is a beautiful noise and if I were hearing it at 3PM instead of 3AM, I might just agree. But how do you shut birds up? I thought maybe we could shine a huge search light directly into the tree, thus mimicking the sun which should send those bird-brains straight to bed, right? The problem, that tree is directly between our house and the building nextdoor which might not be so thrilled to have a searchlight shining in their window. But then again, maybe they are bothered by the birds too....

Lastly, all the scantily-clad, drunken club goers park on our street to avoid having to pay for parking or to tip the valets. But they don't just go to their cars and leave, no they mosey down the street to their cars, usually treating us to an off-key rendition of some ridiculous club song that's most likely made with computers and was never intended to be mimicked by the human voice. When they do get to their cars, they have a nice little chat, about thirty decibals louder than normal speech because they just blew their eardrums out dancing in front of the club's speakers. I do get to live vicariously through them as I get to hear "I can't believe she did it with that ass, whatever, she's got no standards..." yadda, yadda. On tuesday I actually heard someone say "foshizzle." I kid you not. I thought the only person who said that was Snoop Doggy Dog--or maybe it was him, the lighting is a bit dim down there....

Oh well, I'm off to PA tomorrow for my sister's wedding so maybe I'll get some sleep there. Or maybe not. I'm hoping to get some knitting done, though. Hmm, maybe I'll knit myself a eye mask and some cotton earmuffs before I return home....sweet dreams, ya'll, I'm taking a nap.....